“My Husband’s Family Crashes His Birthday Every Year, and I’m Stuck Cooking for Days: This Year, I Tried Something Different”

Every year, like clockwork, my husband’s birthday turns into a chaotic family reunion. His relatives, who live nearby, have made it a tradition to show up uninvited. They come in droves, expecting a feast and a good time, but they never bring gifts or even offer to help. Instead, they treat our home like a free restaurant, and I am the overworked chef.

For the past five years, I’ve spent at least two days in the kitchen before his birthday, preparing an array of dishes to satisfy their insatiable appetites. From appetizers to desserts, I make everything from scratch. It’s exhausting and thankless work. My husband, John, is always grateful, but his family? Not so much.

This year, I decided enough was enough. I was tired of being taken for granted and wanted to enjoy John’s birthday without the stress of cooking for an army. So, I came up with a plan: I would order catering from a local restaurant and let them handle the food. It seemed like a perfect solution.

I discussed my plan with John, and he was supportive. He knew how much effort I put into these gatherings and agreed that it was time for a change. We chose a popular Italian restaurant that offered a variety of dishes everyone would enjoy. I placed the order a week in advance and felt a sense of relief wash over me.

The day of John’s birthday arrived, and as expected, his family started trickling in around noon. They didn’t bother to call or text; they just showed up. I greeted them with a forced smile and directed them to the living room. When they asked about the food, I casually mentioned that we had ordered catering this year.

The reaction was immediate and negative. John’s mother, who always had something to criticize, was the first to speak up. “Catering? Why didn’t you cook like you always do?” she asked, her tone dripping with disapproval.

I explained that I wanted to enjoy the day too and thought this would be a nice change. But my explanation fell on deaf ears. The rest of the family chimed in with their complaints. “We were looking forward to your homemade lasagna,” said his sister. “The kids love your chocolate cake,” added his aunt.

Despite their grumbling, the food arrived on time, and I set it up in the dining room. The spread looked delicious, but the atmosphere was tense. As we sat down to eat, the complaints continued. “This pasta isn’t as good as yours,” said John’s cousin. “The salad is too salty,” remarked his uncle.

I tried to brush off their comments and focus on enjoying the meal with John, but it was difficult. The constant criticism wore me down, and by the end of the evening, I felt defeated. John’s family left without so much as a thank you, leaving behind a mess for me to clean up.

As I stood in the kitchen that night, washing dishes and reflecting on the day, I realized that my attempt to change things had backfired. Instead of making things easier, it had only highlighted how unappreciative his family was. I felt more exhausted and disheartened than ever before.

John tried to comfort me, but I couldn’t shake the feeling of disappointment. I had hoped for a better outcome, but it seemed that no matter what I did, his family would never be satisfied.

In the end, I learned a hard lesson: sometimes, no matter how much you try to change things for the better, people will still find something to complain about. Next year, I’ll have to come up with a new strategy—one that doesn’t leave me feeling so defeated.